Pleasure and Pain
by emeralddusk
Summary: Bound. Bound by pain. Unable to part ways. For Neverending pain's challenge


Pleasure and Pain

Chapter One: The Battle for Everything

Harry and Voldemort's energy collided under the dusk sky. Screams sounded throughout the night. Good and evil collided without mercy. I knew which team I fought for then; I was a wizard. I was one of the heroes of that day. I used to be good. It was so simple back then; just live right. There was no in-between for light and darkness. Harry, Ron, Ginny, Luna, and I were a team, and we knew what we were; The Order of the Phoenix. We honored the memory of Albus Dumbledore as we fought alongside his allies. Our magic was good magic. "Expecto Patronum," we called out, holding our pure wands, which were composed of sphinx, unicorn, or gryphon hair and topped with emeralds born of our childhood energy, and watched our soul sides run, charge, hop, or waddle out into the darkness; lighting the way. My Patronus was an otter. I loved it so dearly, thinking it would always be so pure, and mine. We fought for truth, for light, and for the lives of all wizards and mortals. We started attending Hogwarts when we were kids, formed friendships, and discovered loyalty. Rubeus Hagrid, who served as our guardian, always used to tell us how proud he was...how proud to know such wonderful people, he said. That never used to mean much to me...never used to.

I remember when she held me down on the ground. I was screaming, crying. She laughed, carving it into my arm with a blade; _mudblood_. She was so cold, so heartless. I hated her, but I'd never become her. I never let my anger control me. I never let fear or hatred dominate my actions. That's just the way it was. I saw Harry fight that when Sirius was murdered. We didn't kill; not if we had a choice. That's just the way we were. That's the way everything was.

I stood by, praying Harry would overpower that thing. The Elder Wand glistened with dark magic as Voldemort made his final attempt to kill my friend. I wished I could do something; anything. Finally, the evil warlock fell, and it seemed like we'd won. Then, I heard something; it was a curse, I know. I turned just in time to see Bellatrix wave her wand and project a ball of black and green magic that struck me directly in the chest. I screamed in agony, as did Draco Malfoy; her own nephew. We fell beside one another, and could only watch as the witch met her end. We both knew what had happened, no matter how much we wanted to deny it.

I tried falling asleep that night. It hurt so badly. I clenched my teeth, nearly piercing my lip, and desperately tossed and turned. No matter what I did, I couldn't fight the agony growing within me. The darkness outside gave me no solace, only fear. Burning tears formed in my eyes as I rolled onto my back. Every inch of my body throbbed; like a fire burning inside my veins. I had been violated; broken; scarred beyond my wildest imagination. I couldn't take it. Throwing my hands down like a sad child, I made my choice. Then, I spent the rest of the night crying; not from pain, not from the curse.

Come dawn, the sun was still weak, and the sky dark. I folded my jacket inward, trying to keep myself warm in the icy breeze. It didn't make a difference, though. Draco stood still, watching me dead on. We both wore blank expressions as we began walking closer to one another. The pain began to subside as our bodies reached one another. We joined hands, despite how much we loathed each other. Then, to sell my soul completely, I kissed his cold lips, and we made our swear.

Now, I lay next to him in bed, trying to sleep. I'm not in pain anymore, but I still don't sleep; I hate myself too much. My raven-black locks overshadow my bushy brunette hair, and my skin has grown pale. I forsake the name wizard to bathe in the darkness of witchhood. I didn't feel the pain anymore.

It hurts; knowing what I am. Draco and I stood side by side, waving our black wands, and bleeding the others with dark magic. Then, he took my hand, and we kissed. My black lips received his, and I felt truly lost. The innocent, bushy-haired young brunette walked through the doors of Hogwarts. Her friends, Harry and Ron greeted her, and the three walked off together; surrounded by good magic. Not bound.


End file.
